When we finally sat with the doctor, we were like two teenage kids, footloose and fancy free….not prepared for what she had to say. After inquiring about our knowledge of our baby’s possible heart defect, she allowed me to describe in layman’s terms what we understood. She then turned her computer screen toward us and typed in AVSD. I recognized the acronym from a Facebook group I’m in, where families of children with Down Syndrome and heart defects share their stories. I knew immediately, this was worse than originally thought.
It was time to share our news with our families and friends. Having undergone the feelings of shock and concern in our own hearts, it was time to feel the tremors of those feelings in the faces and voices of those we loved. I carefully crafted a message to send out, which explained the diagnosis: […]
I imagine my soul would have spoken up at some other point, if not in this aisle at the library. Either way, I would not have been ready for it. I looked down at Madeleine who was observing the shelves for herself, from the akward angle of her stroller. A sickening feeling began to creep up my spine and I immediately wanted to escape. I looked once more at the variety of books this isle offered and my soul expressed to my searching self what it really felt, “I wish I had no reason to be standing here.”
Over the next 48 hours, I binge watched Youtube and every single clip that had anything to do with Down syndrome (Ds). I watched countless families stories, a day-in-the-life-of home videos, educational clips about Ds, and the options went on and on. Some of the videos were encouraging, hopeful and honest. Others were discouraging, ambiguous […]
The next day we drove back to Spokane for the scan and a chat with Tanya. I felt the emotions of the day brimming at my eyelids as we drove and talked. When a good friend had called me a couple years ago to tell me he had ‘just the guy’ for me, he described […]
As promised, Tanya called me back on Tuesday. Her call came late in the afternoon and Russ was home. I handed Madeleine to him as I glanced at the familiar number on my phone and I perched on the couch, looking out the window. I half wished I’d grabbed our calendar to remove the guesswork […]
The statistics of risks associated with maternal age, do not communicate this same enthusiasm for baby endeavors. At 35 years old, a woman steps into a world where the numbers begin to tumble and risk of having children with chromosomal abnormality climbs. Although pregnancy is trending higher among 30+ women…we are considered ‘advanced maternal age’.
I arrived at Sacred Heart’s Maternal Fetal Medicine clinic on January 4th. I was 14 weeks pregnant and only just starting to show evidence of a bump. A friend had come to help me with Madeleine. As we sat in the waiting room, I looked at the other pregnant women and wondered what circumstance had brought them there. My mind wandered into that query and I could only imagine their worse case scenarios. I, on the other hand, expected a one-time visit and confirmation that our little one was developing perfectly- just as Madeleine had.
In January, one week before my 36th birthday, we found out that our little one is being ‘knit together’ with an extra 21st chromosome, also known as Down Syndrome. We have experienced all the ‘feels’ as we’ve received this diagnosis and adjusted our expectations to this reality. There are many unknowns ahead, but we are certain of this- that God who began a beautiful, good and perfect work in us…..is faithful to complete it in HIS way, for our best.
Eve's Chronicles 